I am beginning to see

“I am beginning to see that much of praying is grieving.” — Henri Nouwen

Pastors rarely forget that they are pastors, but we often seem to forget that we are people. Maybe it’s the same for all the helping professions, that tendency to become so preoccupied with others that we forget to be human too? 

Oh and about that being human part, isn’t so much of that simply about befriending limitation, embracing mystery and acknowledging grief? I’m asking for a friend. ☺️ Why is that so consistently hard for me? I guess if I’m honest I prefer to pretend I’m limitless if I just apply enough self control. That I can find certainty if I just study hard enough. That grief will evaporate if I just look on the bright side. 

I am holding the wisdom of Nouwen with me on my morning walks. “I am beginning to see that much of praying is grieving,” he said. He was old when he penned that, which gives me a vision for being a beginner in prayer again myself.