She stood there with a scowl of sorts on her face and she wasn’t singing. A combination of bored plus defiant spread across my 3-year old’s face as she stood on stage with the entire preschool for the end of the year performance. All the kids were singing, but Lyla was not singing. All the kids were clapping, but Lyla was not clapping. All the kids seemed happy to be up there, but Lyla did not.
My Mama-heart just loved watching my girl. As other moms looked over at me, I flashed my proud smile and it was honest and true. As Lyla’s mom, I really didn’t care if she sang all the words and did all the actions at the preschool show. I just loved watching my girl.
I think that this is God’s heart for you. You are not a machine designed to crank out products with efficiency. You are a human being, an image bearer, a holy child of God. You are a precious soul full of dignity and worthy of love. You were not produced in a factory, like a cog created to get stuff done. You were knit together in your mother’s womb. Even if your mother never knew you, God saw you and knew you and loved you before you were ever born.
You – with all your quirks.
You – with all your wonder.
You – with all your struggles, shame, and failures.
You — with all your wishes, hopes and dreams.
God sees you on the stage of your life and delights to watch you, to be near you, to marvel at the one-and-only creation that you are. You don’t have to perform perfectly. You don’t have to do anything at all to be fully known, fully loved, with no fear of rejection. God just looks at you and loves you as His beloved child.
You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother’s womb. Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous – how well I know it. You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion, as I was woven together in the dark of the womb. You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed. How precious are your thoughts about me, O God. They cannot be numbered! I can’t even count them; they outnumber the grains of sand! And when I wake up, you are still with me! (Psalm 139:13-18)